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Helping your child navigate the first year of college

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College: a new beginning with endless opportunities. New students arrive on campus each year with optimism, hope and a desire to learn and grow, right? Well, not always. The transition from high school to college can be scary, stressful and difficult for many to manage. I teach freshmen during their first semester at school and have had the privilege of watching many students grow and thrive in college. I have also watched as some students struggle to adjust and succeed. If your child or grandchild is going to be starting college soon, he or she may face some challenges along the way. By knowing what to expect, you can help to support your student on this journey.

Belonging. Many students struggle with loneliness during their first semester or year away from home.Ā  They question whether or not they belong at college; it can be hard to find friends and a support system. Does that mean it is time to pack up and move back home? Absolutely not. But it does mean that they have to leave their dorm rooms, walk away from Instagram, Netflix or Fortnite, and put themselves out there. Encourage them to get involved on campus by finding clubs and organizations that match their interests and sound like fun. This is a great way to meet other students with similar interests, who might become a friend, or at least someone to sit next to in class. Having someone to eat meals with or study with late at night makes all the difference.

Work load. College classes are usually more work than high school classes. Instead of classes that meet each day, college courses may meet only one to three hours per week, but students are expected to do a lot of reading and work on their own. This can be a difficult adjustment, especially when students are used to having time during the day, such as a study hall, to finish their work. It takes discipline to keep up with all the assignments and readings on their own time; discipline that many 18-year-olds do not have. Check in with your students on their academics. Ask how and when they are studying. If it sounds like they are not spending much time on homework and studying, they might need a bit of a nudge.

Time management. There are a lot of distractions on a college campus. It is very easy to be tempted to go out for pizza, play basketball, nap, go to a party ā€” basically anything except study. In addition to all those temptations, students do not have mom or dad or teachers constantly reminding them to do their work. In college, students are expected to be proactive and get their work done, on their own, without being reminded. Ask your students about how they are juggling all their responsibilities. While itā€™s true that everyone should have fun now and then, the reason they are in college is to learn, and learning does not come without work.

College is hard. Many students find that earning As in college is not nearly as easy to achieve as it was in high school. Just as your student was accustomed to being at the top of the class in high school, so was everyone else. Now, the term ā€œaverageā€ takes on a whole new meaning because the bar is higher. So straight As in college might not be realistic, but that is OK. Most employers are looking for a well-rounded student, and a 4.0 GPA is not as important as experiences, such as involvement on campus, internships, leadership roles and other experiences that challenge a person. Certainly encourage your student to work hard in class, but remember that there is more to college ā€” and the eventual job search ā€” than just grades. And if your student is really struggling in class, there are numerous resources on every college campus for academic assistance. But itā€™s the studentā€™s responsibility to seek out and use those resources.

College can be the best years of a personā€™s life, but that does not mean that it is always going to be easy. The transition from high school to college can be tricky, so expect some ups and downs. You can help by staying involved. Call, email or send a quick note of encouragement. Encourage them to work through struggles and difficulties ā€” that is how a person learns and grows. And sending a thoughtful card with $20 hidden inside never hurts, either.

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Emily Murphy is a lecturer and the coordinator of Business Learning Communities at the Indiana University Kelley School of Business at IUPUI.

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